I can’t believe how long it takes.

Thought you’d got rid of didn’t you…well ha! not that easy.

It may have been a while since I last posted anything but don’t think for a second that means I’ve softened and gone all nice…not me, never!

The reason for my absence?

I haven’t had the interweb due to moving house, and have been waiting to have my phone line and interweb switched on.

I can’t believe how long it takes to switch on a phone line…6 weeks!

Yeah, that’s right you heard it correctly, It’s been 6 weeks since I phoned up my provider to tell them I was moving.
It’s been just over 4 weeks since they cut off the service at the old address…so how come it takes so bloody long to switch over?

I don’t know for certain, but surely all it takes is to flick a switch somewhere, be it  software based or an actual physical switch (I’m now imagining some doddery old fella shuffling down a long dark corridor with a big green button at the end!).

I did have to wait for an engineer to come round, I’m guessing so they can check the line, but wouldn’t a phone call pretty much do the same thing? (he was an old fella…coincidence?). You must know the drill…the engineer will call between 1pm and the next millennium, so you have to stay indoors waiting, not being able to go anywhere or do anything just in case you miss the knock o at the door (was almost too scared to go to the toilet…almost).

Strange that an engineer isn’t required when disconnecting a phone line.

The last few weeks have been a little strange, me not having access to the interweb, I couldn’t remember what it was like in the dark ages, before the interweb…what the hell did I do with my time?

Think I may have been mostly drunk, that or…gulp…actually went out into the world and interacted with people, real people not some faceless person called something like acebandit69…

…Maybe I walked to the shops to buy stuff, instead of just using paypal to get all the stuff I don’t really want or need.

Or…I could have read books, actual books printed on paper, with pages you had to physically turn…

…Paid to watch a film at the cinema, or rented a movie from a video shop…

Went to Andys Records and bought the latest album…on, what’s it called again?

Oh yeah…Vinyl

I know…sounds wrong dunnit?

Good job I got the interweb back, don’t need to do all that again…going outside, talking to people…spending money!

I just shudder at the thought of it.

–fotddarren

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