That’s the last time I put the rubbish out!

What a twat, who you may ask well who else…me of course.
Just walked out the front door to put some rubbish in the bin and SLAM! goes the door, oh shit, bugger and more colourful language,
I’m locked out and I’m not wearing any shoes!

Quick, who might have spare key thinks I, the inlaws maybe? and they only live around the corner (I know, don’t say a word).
Luckily, I did have my Mobile in my pocket and so I dial their number, ring, ring, ring and so on, oh no I start to think they’re not in and finally an answer, have to quickly explain what’s happened to the Father-inlaw and through the laughing he states he’s not sure if they have a spare key but he does have some shoes I can borrow!, well that’s alright then I’ve got nowt to worry about.

Have to ring missus at work to see if she left a spare with them but all I get is the bloody voicemail, then I remembered why the front door slammed behind me, I left the back door open to air the place out a bit so when he arrives with the shoes we dart around to the back of the house hoping that it hadn’t also shut itself, oh happy days, the back door was wide open thank the Lord.

So in case you didn’t get it the first time, What a twat.

 

 

And on a completely random note, thats the last time I buy a sarnie from Tesco,  bought one this morning and its left a rather nasty taste in my mouth.

Zombie Apocalypse is Nigh!

The signs are everywhere. You just have to know how to look for them. Oh sure, it starts out innocently enough with an “accident” in the lab…

From Probably Bad News

Yeah, well, it seemed rather appropriate for this ‘ere blog somehow. That’s my excuse anyway. Heh heh

The very first time!

Aha… looks like I’m some sort of guest contributor or author or summat like that. (Heh heh. He’ll regret that!) Jolly good. Finally somewhere I can rant away to me heart’s content without worrying about offending any potential visitors (visitors? what visitors?) cos anything I may have to say (or rather, the language I use to say it) isn’t gonna be anywhere close to that used by mein host.

Excellent… now lemme see… of all the millions of things that really piss me off where shall I start?

Um… er… dammit! Its like when someone says “What are you thinking?” and suddenly and quite miraculously your mind goes a complete blank. Its amazing… and its bloody irritating. So this is probably the very first time that I can’t think of anything to have a rant about. Bugger!

And suddenly… oh yes I can.

Just about to tag and categorise this post prior to hitting the publish button and wha’do I find? No suitable bloody category! You’d think, wouldn’t you, that someone who’d invited you to have a rant on their blog would at least have the common sense and decency to create a category entitled “rants” or something. Wouldn’t you? But oh no, not him.

Sheer damned incompetence I call it.

So come on thingy… get yer act together and lets have some decent categories to bung stuff in. Huh!

[Posted by someone who isn't him]

They don’t deserve a manly punch!

Changed my blog, haven’t really used it much, was a bit weary of being myself and ranting too much. Having read some other blogs, I have realised that I can be a bit more, how shall I put this…. well rude (people who know me know how much of a potty mouth I can be, especially when someone or something pisses me off and that does seem to happen quite frequently).

So I make no appologies for what I may post here, I can’t help the way I feel, which if you haven’t guessed yet is pissed off most of the time due to the stupid fuckwits that seem to be everywhere in all shapes and sizes it doesn’t matter what race, colour or creed, there’s always a few dickheads who ruin the world for everyone else.

Don’t get me wrong, I can and have made mistakes for which I  accept responibility and try to attone for, but there are many, many people who don’t and won’t take responsiblity and it’s those arseholes who piss me off so much that, if were a different man, would quite happliy give them a bitch slap (they don’t deserve a manly punch!).

New To This

As the title suggests I am new to this blogging thing but having been invited by a fellow idiot, I thought I’d give it a go.
Now what does one write about on these thing’s I asked myself, before embarking on such a venture(no point having a blog if you ain’t got nowt to write about) and then whilst setting this thing up the answer presented it self.
Whilst in the process of setting this blog up I found out I could link up to my Flickr account and have my photo’s displayed in a little box in the sidebar, excellent I thought that’ll be fun to play around with.
And so I went ahead full steam trying to figure out how this little display box worked, I think I said something about this being a fun thing to do, boy was I wrong. Just follow the instruction’s simple, all I needed was the URL for my RSS feed link, the instruction’s said and I quote “Your RSS feed can be found on your Flickr homepage. Scroll down to the bottom of the page until you see the Feed link and copy that into the box above.” do you think I could find it, so after scrolling up and down several times and even resorting to squinting at the screen in the vain hope it would magicaly appear and much swearing later, I had to finally admit defeat and consult the Flickr help page, not so much a traditional help page but more of a post a question and hope someone out there has the answer you are looking for. So after several pages of questions and answers, there it was, like a shining light sent down from the heaven’s the answer to my question, the RSS feed link is a little orange button(of coarse how obvious!?), there’s me looking for a text link saying RSS feed.
So I hit the button found the URL and Bob’s your uncle I now have my photo’s on my blog, all I need to do now is figure out how the rest of this blog thing works, so many options so little time.

Thanks to the idiot who got me into this, I had such a great time.